January 03, 2008 10:16 PM by Jennifer_Brown
Man, is it ever exciting to be back in New York again. Back to the opulent Trump Tower. Back to the drama and tension as bright business wannabes push themselves past their limits. Back to Donald Trump’s awe-inspiring assortment of shiny ties (tonight’s was hot pink).
We’re talking the season premiere of Celebrity Apprentice, as a parade of celebs take on The Donald’s challenges, each hoping to grab the big prize: this time not the coveted “You’re hired,” but a fat check to go to their charity of choice.
The Donald gathers the contestants at the New York Mercantile Exchange, and announces to them that they will be split into two teams: boys vs. girls. We have:
Team Empresario (which means “mogul”), consisting of:
Playboy Playmate, Tiffany Fallon
Marilou Henner, of Taxi fame
Olympian, Nadia Comaneci
Jennie Finch, Olympic softball player (and go-o-orgeous!)
Entrepreneur, Nely Galan
Supermodel, Carol Alt
Omarosa (or as competitor Vincent Pastore calls her, “Ponderosa”), controversial (read, “completely and totally disliked by everyone”) contestant from Apprentice season 1.
Team Hydra (some sort of 7-headed immortal dog guarding the gates of hell…hey, you let Gene Simmons pick your name and this is what you get, guys…), consisting of:
Boxer, Lennox Lewis
Ultimate Fighter, Tito Ortiz (who gets the Hey-I-Wanna-Rub-His-Head award)
Trace Adkins, country music legend
Piers Morgan (AKA: That Mean Guy that Ticks Off Sharon Osbourne on America’s Got Talent)
KISS star, Gene Simmons
Thevociferous Vincent Pastore
Omarosa wastes no time in volunteering to be Project Manager for the first challenge; Stephen Baldwin steps up for Team Hydra. The first challenge will be selling hot dogs via New York City hot dog stand.
Right away we can see who are going to be our troublemakers and loudmouths. Vincent Pastore is determined to call it how he sees it (which is usually pretty offensively), and Piers proves himself to basically be Vincent with a British accent. Omarosa acts like…Omarosa, which doesn’t set well with a couple of the ladies. “I just don’t work well with people that are condescending and abrasive,” Tiffany complains.
And then there are the go-getters. While the boys (Piers & Vincent) fight it out over how much to charge for a hot dog (Piers thinks $100 should about do it), Gene Simmons hops on his cell and calls in favors from his rich and powerful friends. Later, during the challenge, when the ladies fear they’re not selling enough, Marilou ignores Omarosa’s decision not to ride on their celebrity status and slips away to call in a favor or two herself. Before we know it, celebrity “friends” are paying $5,000 for a hot dog!
After the challenge, the teams gather in the board room to hear how they did. Donald Jr. announces that the girls sold $17,038 worth of hot dogs. Not too shabby! But Ivanka reveals that the boys sold $52,286 worth!
Donald asks some provocative questions and Piers takes the opportunity to throw down, calling Omarosa “trouble,” and saying she’s Team Empresario’s weak link.
But Omarosa has something to say about that, pointing the finger instead at Tiffany, who Omarosa feels didn’t sell to her full potential. She also singles out Carol, resident New Yorker, who the team had looked to forlocation decisions(Donald criticizes their location choice).
Good news for the guys — as Project Manager, Stephen will receive the combined earnings of the challenge ($69,324) to give to his charity (the Carolyn Baldwin Breast Cancer Research Fund). What’s more, they will be able to watch the girls’ board room fun from a television monitor in their room while they sip their celebratory champagne (The Donald always did know how to add insult to injury).
In the end it’s Omarosa, Tiffany, and Carol in the board room with their heads on the chopping block. The bickering between Omarosa and Carol is fierce, while Tiffany sits placidly by, looking a little scared.
Donald decides that what he’s most disappointed in during this challenge was that Tiffany didn’t call in her “connection” (and Donald’s good friend) Hugh Heffner. Tiffany tries to explain that she was saving that connection for a bigger challenge, but Donald’s not biting.
“Tiffany,” he says, “You’re fired.”
Upstairs, in the guys’ room, Gene Simmons mutters, “Omarosa’s a survivor like a cockroach.”
In the cab, Tiffany says, “It’s incredibly disappointing and frustrating to be the first one fired.”
Donald feels she was the nicest player, but in business, unfortunately, that’s the way it usually works: the nice guy finishes last.
Next on Celebrity Apprentice:
Gene Simmons insults Ivanka.
Photo Courtesy: NBC