February 19, 2008 10:07 PM by DA Southern
Patti Stanger is a psychic, or so she tells us at the beginning of this week’s episode of the Millionaire Matchmaker. Patti explains to her staff how she has been that way since she was six years old, that is to say matching people up, and that her grandmother told her that she had the psychic gift. Wow and all I got from my grandmother was a pair of socks.
Patti was immediately on her staff for getting Millionaires locked in, or “selling” as she likes to call it, and Alison was explaining how she had been working on Larry, but that he was not returning her calls. Patti was determined to get these lonesome doves who are the millionaires ready for love by contacting them herself.
Our first millionaire is Joseph, a 44 year-old real estate mogul who is on the shorter side, as Alison explains. Chelsea explains that the second millionaire is Xander, a good-looking Internet investor-type. In fact, she must of really thought he was good looking because she made it a point to say it several times in the conversation with Patti.
Xander explains that he is worth over 5 million dollars and gets an “A” in finances and an “F” in relationships but does have a daughter from a previous marriage. Patti arranged to meet both men at a restaurant, so she could move the process along as quick as possible.
Patti was working on both men at the same time and asked both men what actresses they could see themselves with. Joseph said Natalie Portman and Xander said Scarlett Johansson. Patti seemed to thrive on the deluge of relevant information being thrown at her, and she explained that she was actually like a computer, a matchmaking computer that takes the crucial information in and spits out the match. I guess, then, she is a psychic matchmaking computer.
Patti finally asked the guys what had been missing from their relationships and Xander said that he was shy and Joseph never really said much except that he liked model- types, but that he just couldn’t make it work and Xander said that all girls are crazy. Patti then spelled out the “no sex on the first date” rule and Xander smiled like he was not too comfortable with that while Joseph was OK with it.
Patti was back at her office searching for girls when Chelsea asked if she could speak to her. Chelsea then asked for more money, essentially more commission per millionaire and Patti flew into a tirade about how she gave 20% commissions, and that it was more than fair, and that she gave more than any other matchmaking service. Both Chelsea and Alison got into it with Patti about the money and Patti was so upset because she felt that she had been fair with them both. The tension was unbearable as Patti continued to shout as she explained about all of the gifts she gives the girls. Alison and Chelsea looked at each other, and you could see that the explosive issue was not settled.
Patti had both millionaires into the office and told them watch through a two-way mirror to see how the girls answered the questions from Patti and to see who they were attracted to. It was a unique way to size up the girls for the millionaires but both men seemed comfortable with the process. It was funny how a lot of the girls didn’t want to go out with shorter guys like Joseph. However, Patti said, “That when a man stands on his money, he is six feet tall.” I guess I was wrong, Money CAN buy you love, or at least get you closer.
Patti discussed the girl selection with the millionaires and both had their favorites and Joseph and Xander both agreed to let Patti pick a favorite as well. Joseph and Xander were both amazed how quickly Patti seemed to pick a girl for them, different from each of their picks and were anxious to see if Patti was right.
Xander was unsure as he met Megan at a restaurant, the girl Patti had chosen for him, and he was certainly not dressed like a millionaire. I guess Patti forgot about the “looking good” lesson. Xander and Megan did the obligatory small talk and Xander was asking about settling down, which seemed to turn Megan off.
Over at Joseph’s house, the beautiful Joanne arrived for her date and Joseph was in awe of her beauty. Joseph was amazed how much she talked, however, even to the extent that when she asked him a question, she never gave him a chance to answer. Joseph was not excited about that aspect of the date and even referenced the talking factor as a reason that he would not see her again
Patti visited with Xander to see how the date went and Xander was not interested in Megan, but was now preparing for a date with his first choice, Violet. Patti was impressed how Xander arranged the date with Violet and gave him tips on how to make an impression with Violet.
Back at lunch with the unhappy co-workers, Alison and Chelsea discussed the unfortunate money incident and how uncomfortable they were about the situation. Alison was egging Chelsea on telling her how good she was and mentioned that she should run her own business. Chelsea agreed and said they should run their own agency together. Great, I see a spin-off coming.
Joseph was on another date, this time with his first choice, Meredith, a five-foot three blond who Patti genuinely thought was a great fit for Joseph. Meredith was an immediate hit with Joseph, and they seemed to hit if off as he took her go-carting. Actually, they were very cute together and genuinely seemed to like each other.
Xander picked his girl, Violet, up and took her gambling and gave her a thousand dollars to gamble away. Xander really gave her great gambling tips and she seemed to take it in and did fairly well. You could tell that Xander was extremely nervous, so much so that Violet was getting a little freaked out by how much he was complimenting her.
Patti called Chelsea and Alison into her office and apologized for how the money situation got out of hand. Patti finally told the girls that she was willing to give them more responsibility and possibly more money if they handled their new duties well. After a group hug, and the hopes of a spin-off dashed, Patti was off to ferret out the results of the dates from the guy’s perspective.
Patti called Violet and found that she was unhappy with all of the compliments from Xander, to the point of it being creepy. Patti then stopped by the restaurant to give him the news as well as Joseph. Patti told Xander that he probably pushed too hard, and that he needs to take it down a notch and that Meredith would go on a second date with Joseph.
Joseph went out with Meredith on the second date, but other than a good time with a lot of laughs, it was not going to continue. Xander was continuing to work with Patti and promised not to creep out anymore girls.
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