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Million Dollar Listing LA Recap: Josh Altman Lists A Slutty House

June 20, 2012 11:11 PM by Melissa Stavarski

Last week on Bravo’s Million Dollar Listing LA, Heather Bilyeu finally finds her way out of Josh Altman’s bed and secures a listing.  Except, she’s still “in bed” with Josh since her only chance at the listing is to co-list with Josh. This puts Madison Hildebrand in bed with Josh Altman too. (My, my, Josh, what a big bed you have.) This week, Madison shows up at the penthouse listing to confront Heather.

Madison tells Heather she lost his trust when she co-listed with Josh. He’s convinced she went into the deal knowing it would be a co-listing, which is only half true.  The “hope” was that Heather would secure her own listing, but come on… that was a long shot!  Heather feels like it’s no different than any other co-listing situation. They go back and forth for awhile – You’re wrong. No, you’re wrong.  You made it personal. No, you made it personal.  It’s all very childish, really.  The conversation needed to happen between the two, as they share a long history, but this was neither the time nor the place.

Josh to Madison as he left, “Looks like I got the girl and the place.” Ouch.

In other penthouse news, the broker’s open was a success.  Josh is glad the listing happened the way it did because he’s hoping to secure a new listing in the Melrose District.  The house was recently done as a flip by Tim and Tom.  Josh says flippers are a realtor’s dream.  This particular home was bought for $645,000.  The flippers put about $200,000 into the house, bringing their total investment to roughly $850,00. A turn around time of 30 days is important to the sellers.

Josh asks the sellers what they think their house is worth. They don’t answer.  I guess it’s a test for Josh, they want to hear his number first.  Josh quickly mulls it over and then hits them with his game plan.  He suggests going into the listing aggressively.  You basically have two options – price the house at exactly what it’s worth, which leaves no room for negotiations, or price the house slightly higher than fair market value to allow for negotiation. Since the sellers wants a quick turn around time, Josh suggests scenario number one – aggressive. They list the house just below $1,150,000.  This approach is risky, but Josh is trusting his instincts. Tom and Tim like what they hear and hire Josh.  I want to hire Josh, and I don’t even have anything to buy or sell.  He is one cool cat.

Between the brokers’ open and the showings, the house is getting a lot of attention.  One particular buyer is a hoot!  First, she brings her little dog with her.  Her dog’s nails are painted (with paw-lish) and Josh Altman finds it hilarious.  (It is funny!)  She’s a ball buster.  She gets on Josh about the price, the countertops, the lack of pool, etc.  He reassures her, it’s priced competitively and there’s been a lot of action.  She calls it a slutty house.  I’m still giggling over that one.

Josh Flagg continues to work with Gabby this week.  Gabby is in a hurry.  She needs a place, like, yesterday, but she’s unable to make spur of the moment decisions.  She likes to sleep on things.

Josh shows Gabby two options this week.  The first is a modern house with an open floor plan and a pretty awesome shower.  However, Gabby thinks it’s too big.  The next house is a “house on a hill” that offers her dog more places to poo.  After a night’s sleep, Gabby decides on the “plenty of poo places” house. Unfortunately, while Gabby was sleeping on it, the current tenant extended her lease.  She makes on offer on the modern house instead. Her offer is accepted.  Josh explains why he takes on smaller listings.  He says, “A lease is not just a lease.  It’s a beginning of a relationship.”  Five years down the road, Gabby could be some fancy pants designer looking to buy her new home.  She’s going to remember Josh.

Madison Hildebrand goes to Utah to spend time with his family  mingle with realtors.  Madison and his family spend some time discussing Heather. Madison asks his parents what their plans are for their first home in Utah… from there, Madison plays realtor all weekend.  Madison is not licensed in Utah, so he cannot list a house.  His plan is to find a realtor, to be confident with the decision, and then kick back and relax.  Madison says, “I’m used to being the slut, not the pimp.”

Checking back in with Josh Altman, he brings two offers to the table. The price tag of just under $1,150,000 was the sellers absolute low.  There is no room for negotiation.  The sellers tell Josh they’re both crap offers.   Take one offer, make it right, and don’t let me down, the sellers warn Josh.

RTVM – Team Heather or Team Madison?

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Photo credit: Bravo

Topics: Bravo Reality TV Shows, Million Dollar Listing |

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11 Responses to “Million Dollar Listing LA Recap: Josh Altman Lists A Slutty House”

  1. cf Says:
    June 24th, 2012 at 3:18 pm

    Just watch when Josh Altman had was having an open house . I believe it was for Tims and Toms house . it was on bravo 6/24/12 2:30 pm .Anyway his assistant was making fresh lemonade and he was mixing the lemonade then tasting it with a wooden spoon and putting the spoon back in the pitcher without even washing it, oh how gross!!!I think if you have that kind of opening and serving food to that class of buyers you need to have a professional than knows about proper health care with food and drinks. double dipping is a no no….

  2. MARYANNE Says:
    June 28th, 2012 at 12:13 pm

    Josh altman looks like Bart simpson! really check it out . Heather is ugly with that big ass jew nose. Madison be happy you fired her, Madison you are so handsome and classy.
    I love Josh Flagg! I change the channel when heather & josh Altman are on. I would rather see closet gay chad back on the show

  3. maryanne Says:
    June 28th, 2012 at 3:15 pm

    Josh altman looks like bark simpson– and Heather looks like his sister

  4. julie Says:
    June 30th, 2012 at 8:25 pm

    Maryann you are so right josh and heatherr look like bart and marggie simpson

  5. Karen Miller Says:
    August 3rd, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Josh and Heather are two peas in a pod. Both are greedy, know-it-alls, arrogant..you name it. Madison has tried to be a gentleman and Bravo for him. I agree, I turn the channel when Josh A. swaggers onto the screen…absolutely repulsive

  6. carla pronti Says:
    August 16th, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    Josh Altman is such a homely little creature the only thing that would attract a woman to him is in his pockets. A plastic surgeon might help your face, I think your over inflated ego hides some real insecurities that you have. Your gold digging skank of a girlfriend is just as homely as you!!! She acts like low class white trash !!!!!! I change the channel when you two are on.

  7. Alayna Says:
    August 21st, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    First of all anyone saying bad things about Josh or Heather clearly have no life!! Why do you feel the need to bash people. I don’t think what Madison did was right personally but also am not going to bash him because he is NOT a bad person. No one on that show is bad…just differences of opinions and personalities. Really Josh is very professional and Mikey’s personality is what brings people back. Why bash people? I guess this is what is wrong with the world – bullying everywhere.

  8. easy to spot Says:
    September 3rd, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    altman is such a slimy looking creature. he’s the stereotypical jew. can spot these creatures a mile away no matter how many times they change their names and get plastic surgery.

  9. Sharon Genuec Says:
    August 10th, 2013 at 8:27 am

    Get that big nosed jew Altman off the air. He and his girlfriend are in LA,home of plastic surgeons, spend the money and get those noses fixed. While you’re at it, get rid if the obnoxious Jewishness! They’re both stereotypical Jews, loud, aggressive, cocky. I think Jews are taught that at birth.

  10. Jill Says:
    August 12th, 2013 at 7:04 am

    I can’t believe what I’m reading. You don’t have to like the people you watch, & you have every right to say that, but your racist antisemetic comments are quite appalling – the bullying needs to stop!

  11. Sue Says:
    September 10th, 2013 at 8:24 pm

    Wow, the unashamed antisemitism displayed by these comments is unbelievable! The stereotypes and hate, I’d love to see from what cretins this is spewing from. Ignorant, hateful, pond scum I’m sure.


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