July 12, 2012 08:36 PM by Ryan Haidet
Just when you thought it was safe to watch reality television again, CBS has ruined things by casting yet another member of Russell Hantz‘s family. Just like we saw last fall with Russell’s nephew, Brandon, on Survivor: South Pacific, we now have to watch his brother, Willie, compete in the Big Brother house. Within moments of moving in, multiple people thought Willie had a haunting resemblance of Russell. Naturally, trying to disconnect himself from the negative concept of the Hantz family name, Willie acted as if he had never even heard of Russell despite the fact he looked, talked and acted exactly like him. Having him in the house is just like having Russell play because we’re going to have to hear his name over and over and over and over and over and over… You get my point. On top of this silly idea to have a Hantz in the house, CBS also decided to inflict the “expected the unexpected” motto with a twist involving four coaches made up of previous contestants. Who returned to the house and what exactly is their role? Read on to find out!
After the 12 new contestants walked in the house, they ran around from room to room, found their beds and introduced themselves. Ian stood out the most to me because he’s a self-admitted nerdy superfan of shows like Big Brother and Survivor. His glasses and actions are almost replications of John Cochran from Survivor: South Pacific. Ian was also one of the contestants who recognized Willie as a potential relative of Russell Hantz. He even went as far to say he was 99.9 percent certain he had to be Russell’s brother.
The funniest moment came when Wil finished introducing himself. Joe said in the Diary Room that Wil could be one of the prettiest chicks in the house — so pretty he might try to pick him up by mistake at a bar.
The only other person who really stood out in the introductions was Ashley. It wasn’t because of anything she said, it’s because the editing portrayed her to be a complete idiot.
Meet The Coaches
Moments later, Julie Chen appeared on the living room screen to reveal to the houseguests that four former players were about to return to the house as coaches. One at a time, Dan (season 10 winner), Janelle (seasons six and seven), Mike “Boogie” (seasons two and seven — winner) and Britney (season 12) burst into the house. While I truly believe most of the newbies had no idea who the majority of the four veterans are, Ian was absolutely starstruck. Each time the door swung open and one of the returnees walked in, he looked in absolute awe.
Here’s how the coach twist works. Unlike previous seasons in which the returning players are competing for the $500,000 grand prize like everybody else, they are simply there to coach their own teams made up of the new contestants. If one of their players claims the grand prize at the end of the game, they will walk away with $100,000 for being the winning coach.
While I really like the four people Big Brother selected to return to the game, I absolutely hate the concept of coaches. Hate it. If they can’t be in the game as full-fledged players, then why bother? If I was a newbie in the house, I don’t need somebody who played the game before offering me their advice. This is my game. Not yours. Let me make my own decisions with the people I choose to align with. Having to play the game to impress a wannabe coach — including two players who didn’t even win their seasons — seems extremely insulting and stupid. Better yet, forget bringing back any returning players. What’s wrong with having a cast of original, fresh characters?
With the houseguests all gathered together in the living, the Chenbot popped up on the screen to offer up the second twist by revealing one of the 12 newbies would be eliminated by the end of the first night.
The coaches had to select their teams in school-yard-pick-’em style. Here’s how the teams broke down:
- Team Britney: Shane, Willie and JoJo.
- Team Dan: Kara, Danielle and Jodi (the last pick).
- Team Boogie: Frank, Ian and Jen.
- Janelle: Wil, Ashley and Joe.
The first Head of Household competition began moments later. The coach of the winning team would then choose which of their players would be HoH. The coach of the losing team had to decide which of their players should be the first person booted from the game.
When the competition was over, team Britney was victorious. She quickly chose to put Willie up as the first HoH. Oh, goody.
On the flipside, team Dan was dead last in the competition and he selected to boot Jodi Rollins — the person who was picked last when the teams were being divided. It’s a shame she is the first to go because I really liked Jodi’s personality. I think she could have been fun to watch this summer.
But alas, we’re stuck with Willie. I wish CBS would just stop their silly love affair with the Hantz family. It’s tired. Move on. We don’t need another Hantz family member invading our favorite reality shows. They even gave him the final word at the end of tonight’s premiere when he discussed his strategy for the summer by saying, “It’s all about me.”
Aren’t you excited he’s here?
What did you think of the premiere episode? Who is your favorite new contestant? Do you like the coach twist? Are you happy another Hantz is playing on a reality show? Sound off and leave a comment below!
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Photos courtesy of CBS.