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Breaking Amish Recap: Brooklyn Bridge and Boner Woes

October 07, 2012 11:45 PM by Melissa Stavarski

Last week on Breaking Amish, Rebecca got new teeth, Sabrina got a job, and Kate introduced us to Crazy Kate via the Kate Cam. This week, Jeremiah goes to a strip club, and all he gets is a lousy t-shirt boner. Ah, yes… TLC programming at its finest.

While they are all out to eat, Kate takes issue with the others’ negative comments about the Amish. She insists there are a lot of good things about the life. Abe says the Amish are just like any other human beings – some are good and some are perverts. When Jeremiah starts to talk about Amish men having sex with animals, Kate signals for the check. She thinks the topic of discussion is inappropriate and doesn’t want to hear anymore.

Rebecca wants to know, “If the Amish are so perfect from where she’s from, why did she leave?”

Jeremiah says, “Kate is not here for the experience, she is just running away from her troubles.”

Speaking of Amish perverts… Jeremiah brings Abe to a strip club. Abe tells Jeremiah he will not participate. Jeremiah pushes Abe. Still, Abe refuses because of Rebecca. Jeremiah demands, “I thought you were more of a man than this.” Abe argues, “It isn’t about being a man. It’s about having respect for my woman.” Mumbling about bros before hoes, Jeremiah goes inside the strip club alone. Jeremiah has a grand time… despite leaving with a “boner and nothing else.”

Ick. Excuse me for a moment while I scrub that thought out of my brain.

On the way back to the hotel, Jeremiah slurs his way through a rant about how a man (Abe) should not let a woman (Rebecca) control his life.

 

Next, the group goes out to dinner. As per usual, Kate and Sabrina drink too much wine, act stupid, and annoy the others. Kate and Sabrina attack Jeremiah with their purses, Kate yells something about being a cowgirl, and Sabrina shoves tiramisu in Jeremiah’s face.

Jeremiah sits in the Breaking Amish van and pouts about his wounded ego ribs and intense dislike of bitches tiramisu. Kate complains because Jeremiah is always so moody, and then the happy-happy drunk girl turns into weepy-sad drunk girl. Sabrina tells Jeremiah that Kate is crying, but Jeremiah doesn’t care. He says, “She doesn’t take responsibility for the s**t she does. She has a drinking problem. She does stupid s**t and blames the alcohol.”

Sabrina tells Jeremiah to hit her. Sabrina begs, “Gimme your best shot. Come on, beat me with my purse.” When Jeremiah doesn’t react, Sabrina storms off, yelling that she’s “done, done, completely done with this s**t.”

A visit to the Brooklyn Bridge leaves the group rather miserable. Kate apologizes to Jeremiah about purse night, but Jeremiah thinks her apology is full of attitude. Rebecca cries when a lady on a bike bumps into her… she completely overreacts. “Don’t ever even come to NYC unless you’re prepared to have your ass handed to you on a platter for not even doing anything,” she says.

Kate asks the others – what happens after Breaking Amish? All Kate knows is that she doesn’t want to return to PA. While Sabrina misses the country, Jeremiah loves the city. Rebecca says she just wants to “get the hell off the horrible Brooklyn Bridge.”

Sabrina, Kate, and Rebecca share a girl day. They treat themselves to manicures, pedicures, makeup, and bikini/Brazilian waxes. Sabrina asks the esthetician if she ever gets tired of looking at vagina all day. Rebecca says waxing is the dumbest thing she has ever done in her life, but she admits looking good is starting to make her feel better about herself.

Abe and Rebecca make the unfortunate decision to bring Jeremiah to the laundromat with them.

Jeremiah tells them he wouldn’t be caught dead doing laundry, as it’s a “woman’s job.” Rebecca warns Jeremiah that no English girl is going to wait on him hand and foot like an Amish woman would.  Jeremiah insists that his woman will. Rebecca wishes him luck finding her. One last Jeremiah musing: “Amish chicks were brought up to do the laundry and everything else, so I’m going to make them do it.. can’t tell all these damn women anything.”

Random news: Sabrina has a horrible first day at the restaurant. Jeremiah passes his driver’s test. Abe decides he wants to ask Rebecca to marry him, so he needs to secure a job and/or go back to school. Naturally, Abe ends up at a stunt school. Abe explains, “The Amish offer three jobs… construction, farming, and masonry work. Falling off a building… awesome and you get paid for it.”

Episode five ends with Kate shopping for a bikini for an upcoming photo shoot. And, back at the hotel, Kate’s DUI arrest record ends up in Rebecca’s hands. Tune in next Sunday for more Amish adventures in New York City.

Tell us – Are you watching Breaking Amish?  What do you think? 

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Photo Credit: TLC

Topics: Breaking Amish, TLC Reality TV Shows |

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1 Comment »

One Response to “Breaking Amish Recap: Brooklyn Bridge and Boner Woes”

  1. frank Says:
    October 8th, 2012 at 8:47 am

    What a bunch of losers. Kate and Rebecca are nothing but 2 bit you know whats and the other broad is a low down liar. The two guys are the lowest form of life there is. For one of them to call some of the Amish perverts may have some truth I contend he is the bigest pervert of all. Rebecca may be proof she is he result of incest what a little bag.

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