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Russell Swan Talks Survivor Regrets And Depression

October 15, 2012 01:00 PM by Donna W. Martin

Russell Swan is a two-time competitor on Survivor. He first competed in 2009 but his experience ended abruptly when he became dehydrated and collapsed. He returned to compete again in 2012 but things didn’t go so well then either and was voted off fourth. According to People, he attributes the loss to his tribe saying, “My tribe wasn’t engaged; the other tribes were hungrier. The other tribes were stronger than us.”

Swan said he trained and prepared himself before returning to Survivor the second time. “I trained hard for this. I rode my bike several miles from home to the office; I went to my wife’s swimming class; I went to the gym three times a week. I was doing something six days a week to get ready to play this game. But I didn’t train to dive down 20 feet to get puzzle pieces. Name one city guy who can do that!”

Swan felt like he was on a weaker team and that attributed to him leaving the game as soon as he did. After Swan’s tribe lost four consecutive challenges, he was voted off the show. He describes how it felt and what he went through, “I’m the first returning player that is out, so it feels like a failure. No one likes to fail, and I hate to lose, so I am still processing it day by day. But yeah, you could say I have a lot of regrets. … I’m p*ssed off.”

Swan goes on to explain, “When I came back from the Philippines, I went into denial. I couldn’t sleep; I was irritable. I thought, “I’ll pretend like it never happened.” I hid everything that had to do with the experience. And it was working, until the show started airing. Every week the show would play, and it’s like I relived it again: the failures, the discouragement.”

He continued, “I have never really experienced depression, but this is activity-induced depression. I can’t be like this. I have a daughter, and she won’t understand if I’m up in my own head all the time. So I have to compartmentalize being on Survivor and move on.”

As bad as the situation was and as much as Swan would like to have won, he says, “My sense of self-worth and capability: physical, intellectual, emotional, all of it has been thrown into question. Basically, to find out that you suck at every aspect of the game, it’s really tough. I did what I could. And don’t worry; you won’t read about me jumping off a cliff because of this. I’ll be fine.”

Do you think Swan’s tribe is to blame for him being kicked off the show? Or was he just simply a bad player? Leave a comment below and tell us what you think.

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Photo Credit: CBS

Topics: CBS Reality TV Shows, Survivor |

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