March 12, 2013 06:28 PM by Megan Thompson
Celebrity Wife Swap is all new tonight on ABC. This week, the wives of Gilbert Gottfried and Alan Thicke switch households. It’s the fancy versus the frugal this week. So which celebrity has the obsession with the dollar store?
The first family we are introduced to is Alan Thicke’s family. Tanya is his wife of eight years, but he has had two wives prior to her. She lets us know that if he met her first, he could have saved a lot of money – but she would have spent that too! “I married a younger woman, because most of the women my age are dead,” Alan jokes about his younger model wife. Is it me or does Alan’s face look like he has had one too many nip tucks? Besides Tanya, Alan has one 15 year-old son. The extended family is their staff- a property manager, a housekeeper and a hairdresser. There is no doubt, Tanya is the queen of this castle.
If you don’t recognize the voice of Gilbert Gottfried, then you must be deaf. Movies, comedy clubs and SNL are just some of the jobs on Gilbert’s resume. His family consists of his wife Dara and two children, Lily and Max. “My kids look like me, if I was born attractive,” Gilbert jokes. There are no maids or staff at the Gilbert household; they are very frugal NYC family.
It’s the day of the swap and the two wives are on the way to their new homes for the week. “Oh, this is why I live in Santa Barbara, this place is about the size of my bedroom,” Tanya snipes. Of course, Dara can’t get over the size of the house she is roaming endlessly through. Once Dara sees a picture of Growing Pains, she realizes she is Alan Thicke’s house. After being so confused by all the bird statues, she finally sees a picture of Gilbert and realizes who he is. Tanya quickly realizes that she is going to be watching three kids, instead of two.
This next scene looks like a creepy episode from The Bachelor, because Alan and Dara are drinking champagne together in the hot tub. Alan explains that he and Tanya like to end their day this way every night. “I could get used to this,” Dara says as she relaxes in the bubbles.
The next day, Dara lies in bed and reads magazines enjoying all the free time. But she does have work to do, Dara has to plan the big dinner party she will be hosting for the night. Then there is Tanya who is exhausted because she had to get up before 10 a.m. to get the kids off to school. Gilbert then tells Tanya that it’s his wedding anniversary, so he is going to show her how he treated Dara last year. This California diva is more than appalled when she finds out that the day consists of a stop at a .99 store. But like any shopaholic, the store doesn’t really matter – she fills up her cart with more than $200 worth of items!
“I could still call Alan’s agent, I’m sure he could get us tickets to this show,” Tanya whines to Gilbert. Gilbert is making this girl stand out in the cold, in the hopes they will score cheap tickets to the theater. But when he finds out the tickets are $30, he walks away. Tanya is relieved when they head to dinner, but her happiness quickly fades. Gilbert walks into a nice restaurant, but then heads to the kitchen where a small table is set up. I guess he gets free dinners at this place, so of course he loves it! But when Tanya has to move her chair so the chef can get into the refrigerator, she loses it. After a verbal rant, Tanya gets up to leave. ”What are you the Queen of England?” Gilbert asks her.
It’s time for the rules to change and the new wives are being harsh. Dara is firing all the staff and challenges Alan to buy his wife a meaningful gift for only a dollar. Dara takes Alan to the dollar store to pick something “nice” out for Tanya. His choice is the classic heart balloon on a stick. There is no doubt that balloon is going in the garbage when Tanya gets home.
Tanya is being rough on Gilbert too! She wants to have a normal date night, for Gilbert to learn how to drive and to host an elegant dinner party. The party has begun and Gilbert is appalled to see bartenders and chefs in his house, but seems to loosen up an enjoy his friends. However, the driving lesson Tanya planned doesn’t go well and she thinks walking is a better choice for Gilbert.
Finally the swap is over and the couples reunite to talk about their weeks. Of course, Tanya tells how horrified she was by the anniversary date Gilbert took her on. “They think we are too materialistic,” Alan tells his wife. This statement sets Tanya off and she starts ripping her jewelry off. But then decides that she works hard managing her staff, so she snatches it right back up! Uh-oh, Alan is going to have to buy her more jewelry for embarrassing her. The couples cheers to the swap, but are ready to go home.
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Photo credit: ABC