April 05, 2013 05:17 AM by Megan Thompson
First we get to meet pageant mom, Marianne Curry, who is sporting a crown and sash. She lives in Ohio with her husband and three children. And guess what – Marianne isn’t the only pageant queen in the house. Her children also participate in pageants, even the boys. “If you look good, you get better service,” Marianne tells the cameras.
And the complete opposite of Marianne is Heidi Cochran, who declares herself as a modern redneck. She kills her food, skins it and eats it. Also on the farm is her husband and her two kids – a boy and a girl. It’s all about camo, no make-up and hard work. Basically a pageant mom’s worst nightmare!
The morning of the swap the wives pack their bags and head out the door. Marianne arrives on the farm wearing leather pants, big hoop earrings and sporting a side pony. Basically she is way over-dressed for this farm life she will be living for two weeks. “I am shocked and disgusted,” she says as she walks in the door and sees a mountain of laundry. The Cochran family lovingly refers to this pile of laundry as the ”laundry tornado.” Heidi on the other hand, can’t believe how immaculate Marianne keeps her house. The wives sit down to the manuals and start freaking out about how their lives will be turned upside down.
It’s the first morning of the swap and Heidi is trying to bond with the two boys. The boys complain they have long hair, because their mom wants them to. Leo is often mistaken for a girl and really wants to chop off his pageant locks. But the slow morning doesn’t last, because it’s time to hop in the minivan and shuttle the kids around all day. The kids don’t want to cooperate and Heidi doesn’t blame them. After a long day, Heidi sits down with the daughter and asks her about all the activities she is in. The little girl seems overwhelmed by all the things she has to do, so Heidi tears up.
Back on the farm, Marianne had to wipe her makeup off and pick up poop in the yard. Then Scott takes this beauty queen out duck hunting so they can eat dinner. Then after a long day, Scott has his poker buddies over and expects Marianne to wait on them hand and foot. But when Scott critiques the way Marianne loads the dishwasher they end up yelling at each other.
It’s rule change time! Heidi is more than ready to lay down the new laws in the Curry household. The first rule is that any kid that screams at Dad or says no, has to do five push-ups. Heidi also wants Craig to “man-up” and not looks like such a pretty boy. She throws Craig some camo to wear. But then Heidi drops the bomb, that the little boys can cut their long hair. OMG – Marianne is going to die if they follow this rule! Then, Heidi rips up the family’s schedule and says it’s time to enjoy life. Craig is still struggling with disciplining his kids, so Heidi has a conversation with him about it. Craig says he feels over-whelmed by the three kids without his wife present. “I want to see you be more assertive with kids,” Heidi tells him. The family actually enjoys a whole day without scheduled activities – they just play outside in the snow. Then it’s the big day, the family goes for haircuts. Will Craig actually let Leo cut his hair? You can tell Craig is nervous about what his wife will say or do to him, but he allows it! “I love my new haircut,” Leo tells his dad.
Marianne walks in with a crown and sash to announce her new rules. The first rule is that the family must take pride in their house and tackle the infamous laundry tornado. She also announces that the family must eat dinner at the table together, not in their separate beds. But of course, this pageant mom also wants to have the little girl, Savannah, participate in a pageant. Right after the rule changes, Marianne has the entire family scrubbing the house down. After the inside is clean, Marianne takes the family outside to clean up the bone graveyard. Yes, the family throws their animal carcasses out in the backyard! But Scott refuses to pick up the bones and tells Marianne to shut her face and walks away. After Scott cools down, him and Marianne talk about “the bone yard” and hug it out. Now it’s time for a fashion show, since Marianne has picked out some new clothes for the kids. “I’m never wearing this again,” the oldest boy says as he walks down the steps. Marianne even takes Scott to a spa for a manicure and pedicure – and then puts him in a suit.
The swap is over and the wives are excited to get back to their own lives. The couples meet to discuss their experiences over the past two weeks. Right away, Marianne says she was disgusted by Heidi’s house. Well, Heidi doesn’t hold back and tells Marianne that her house is just a shrine to her pageant days. This is where it gets ugly and Marianne calls Heidi’s husband a slob. ”If you don’t want to be knocked in your face, you better watch how you talk about my husband,” Heidi screams at Marianne. Craig is so dumbfounded, he can’t say a thing – or he is a wimp and can’t stick up for his wife! Finally, Scott is the only rational person in the room and demands that the conversation get on a positive vibe. But then Craig tells his wife about Leo’s haircut and she immediately tears up. She acts pretty cool about it, but you know Craig is going to hear about this one later. Marianne does admit that maybe their life is a little bit too scheduled and they can slow it down a bit for the kids. The couples end on a positive note and hug each other goodbye.
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Photo credit: ABC